Stabbing with the bulls

Ow...that's not good pain at all.

Some fun Bush-isms from this week!

1. "The same folks that are bombing innocent people in Iraq were the ones who attacked us in America on September the 11th, and that's why what happens in Iraq matters to the security here at home."
Oh right, I thought the tirrirrisss (terrorists) were Saudi, but I guess they were Iraqi. Surely we wouldn't move the largest American defense contractor to Dubai if that was true.

2. "Because of the actions we've taken, al-Qaida is weaker today than they would have been." - Yesterday when asked about the new threat assessment from U.S. counterterrorism analysts saying al-Qaida has used its safe haven along the Afghan-Pakistan border to restore operating capabilities to a level unseen since the months before Sept. 11, 2001 - but of course, that assessment was based on a "gut feeling."

3. On planning somehow to leave Iraq... "It would mean that we'd be risking mass killings on a horrific scale."

4. On Congress' vote to pull troops out by April '08 "I don't think Congress ought to be running the war." Let's see, he doesn't decide what happens with the war, that's for the generals on the ground But I thought he was the decider? Doesn't the military report to the Commander in Chief or is he like Dick's office and no longer a part of the executive branch?

5. "I believe we can succeed in Iraq and I know we must." - Again, yesterday. WTF?!? Succeed??? He lied to us about going there in the first place! LIED! And the talk is of victory and success? At what cost and for what end? It's mass murder...it never should have been a war in the first place.

6. I love Helen Thomas...I also love catching Bush in a lie...

Q Mr. President, you started this war, a war of your choosing, and you can end it alone, today, at this point -- bring in peacekeepers, U.N. peacekeepers. Two million Iraqis have fled their country as refugees. Two million more are displaced. Thousands and thousands are dead. Don't you understand, you brought the al Qaeda into Iraq.


THE PRESIDENT: Actually, I was hoping to solve the Iraqi issue diplomatically. That's why I went to the United Nations and worked with the United Nations Security Council, which unanimously passed a resolution that said disclose, disarm or face serious consequences. That was the message, the clear message to Saddam Hussein. He chose the course.

The fun part about this is that inspectors WERE there and Hussein DID let them in and they reported back that there was no evidence of anything to disarm. Obviously, Saddam was not put to death for WMDs or for not complying with orders to disarm himself of weapons he did not have. He was killed as a result of a weapon he used in the 80s against a rebellion. That weapon was indirectly provided by the US. Note image below - December, 1983


Anybody pissed yet?

Hi Skeezmo! I see your resurrecting the megavain.....just thought I'd chip in.

I'm back, baby...

More on the trip to Anna Nicole's grave after these messages...

:::silence:::

Yeah, I starfucked a corpse, but as Mike Patton says in Star A.D.

"...And when you die, you'll become
something worse
Than dead-
You'll become
A legend..."

Later, Future Readers...wherever you are...

Musings on American Idol

So, Skeez is busy being all political and crap, I just want to lighten the load with a little fluff.

It is snowing like hell and I'm stuck at work doing, well, absolutely nothing. Except this. And reading about American Idol online.

Yes, American Idol. Go ahead. Laugh. Point. Do all those things that people like you do to people like me......

I realize there is absolutely no credibility to this show whatsoever, but I still watch it, and I still find it entertaining. But I must point out the obvious and here it goes:

1. Sundance Head. Funny name. Very little talent. How the hell did he wind up in the top 24? Oh yeah, his dad was famous for something once. If I remember correctly.

2. That Antonella chick. I guess she's hot. Not my type.....you know she's the kind of girl who will get everything she wants in life because guys think shes hot. Did I mention she couldn't sing her way out of a paper bag? Too many Britney Spears likenesses, I'm just waiting for the breakdown.

3. Chris "I look like JackOsbourne" dude. I like him because he's funny! And not funny in that "I just say it to be outrageous" way (At least, I think so) He's funny in a really witty way. He's rendition of Ray LaMontagne's "Trouble" was a little too pretty for my tastes though.

4. Blake the Beatbox. Um, He's hot.

5. The chick who looks like the mom from "Family Matters." 'Nuff said.

There's also that creepy looking bald guy, the Indian (I think, or middle eastern or something) kid who looks like the "I don't believe in God, I believe in Science" guy from "Nacho Libre," and the one quasi-flamboyant guy who always does that weird dance when he sings which reminds me of a Chippendales dancer. Oh, and that guy who thinks he's Justin Timberlake when all he really does is sing through his nose.

I can't stand any of the girls -with the exception of the black girls, does that make me racist?

Paula is a nutbag.
Randy can't say anything beyond "Ah-ight," "Dude," and "Dog"
Simon just gets more lovable as the season goes on.

Wait. I think I hate this show after all....


Luvs always!
The "MEAT" is in your "MOUTH"

PS. Have you ever looked out the window of a high rise building and watch a blizzard? It's crazy....it looks like its snowing upwards (which it probably is, but I'm no fucking scientist) I did this at work today.....stared out the 17th story window of my office for 15 minutes. Delightful!

Does he have the right to turn me Christian?

Well, maybe. According to the Baltimore Sun today, our President is using our taxes to fund "faith-based-initiatives." That's pretty fucking arrogant.

Which faith, though? Muslim? Oh, Allah, no. It seems to me he more wants to stamp out that religion all together? Buddhism? As if Buddhists were even real...what about Hindu? Lol! Right? Thousands of Gods? HA! No, no, God is the only God. And Jesus...and the Holy Spirit...and the Holy Ghost...and all the Saints. And that's it.

Now, seriously. Why are we funding faith-based initiatives if the initiatives are only based on the one faith? Because the first Amendment means nothing to this presidency.

I believe the only reason he is using the faithful Americans of this country, the Christian religion as an excuse to do un-Christian things, is because of the success his party has had in controlling the people through Christianity. It is certainly not because of his Christian ideals...as far as a Christian goes, I can't see that George W. Bush is a Christian at all except that he says he is all the time.

So why on earth would I back (pay for) faith-based initiatives when I have no proof of this man's faith at all? His lawyers are asking the supreme court today to shield these programs from any legal action. Christian? He's breaking the A-#1 rule this country was based on...freedom of religion. This is the country that did NOT want to pay taxes to England nor be forced into Catholocism or Protestantism (depending on what kind of King/Queen was in power at the time...remember the story of Lady Jane Grey?), but yet the Bush Administration wants to fund only programs that serve our children and underpriveleged in a Christian-based manner? What about people who do not believe that? Isn't this the land of the free? Only if you're a Christian, I guess, but the world of Christianity right now serves absolutely no purpose in my life.

Here are some images of Bush being Christian:




And to remind Christians of the Beatitudes (let me know if I'm off base here, but Bush and his initiatives do not seem to jive with Christ's teachings):

Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they who mourn,
for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the meek,
for they shall possess the earth.

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for justice,
for they shall be satisfied.

Blessed are the merciful,
for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the pure of heart,
for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they shall be called sons of God.

Blessed are they who suffer persecution for justice sake,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Faith-based inititaves? I haven't seen any such thing with this Presidency.

Google Imaged "bush faith based"

Fuckin' Idiot

Yup. I said fuckin' IDIOT!

Run for the hills mutha fucka!

The gays are coming! The gays are coming!!!!

ADDENDUM:

So, yes, you're flamboyant friend, Skeezmo here to add to Meatmouth's interesting submission.

Argument #1: How can there be an argument when the first argument in this article is based on a William Kristol magazine article (do not forget, Mr. Kristol's funding came partially from Robert Kagan who co-founded the Project for a New American Century, formerly "Project for a Republican America" which, let's not forget, wrote a lashing letter to Bill Clinton urging war in Iraq to (and I quote) "protect our vital interests in the Gulf." Yep. I said, Bill Clinton. The letter was written in 1998, 4 years before the current war in Iraq was being considered as indirect retaliation for 9/11 because Iraq had "Weapons of Mass Destruction."

Mr. Kristol's magazine, "Weekly Standard" is anything, but standard. It is a mouthpiece for the religious republican front/movement and advocates spreading Christian initiatives all over the world as a force for "democracy," an ironic and tyrannical endeavor. He is funded by and works closely with our friend Rupert Murdoch, who you may know as the owner of Fox News, an extremely, unapologetic "News" station leaning 100% right (neo-conservative republican) and makes no bones about it.

Rupert, a friend and supporter of Pat Robertson's run for President in 88, supported and contributed to both of George W. Bush's Presidential runs and ALL 175 of Murdoch's publications editorialized in favor of the war in Iraq in 2003. Fair and balanced?

Perhaps before reading more on this organization's intent and reasoning for existence (the destruction of marriage in Scandinavia), perhaps looking elsewhere, like here The Slate 2004, or here UCLA School of Law or here Media Matters where Fred Barnes denies the Weekly Standard ever said such a thing. Ha.

If you'd like to read more about Fred Barnes, please go here Wiki Fred Barnes. Here are some fun quotes by Fred Barnes to inspire us all to think like him and listen to his gay-hating rhetoric with serious focus and concentration:

"The war was the hard part. The hard part was putting together a coalition, getting 300,000 troops over there and all their equipment and winning. And it gets easier. I mean, setting up a democracy is hard, but it is not as hard as winning a war." - 4/10/03

"WE NOW KNOW WHY the Bush administration hasn't made the capture of Osama bin Laden a paramount goal of the war on terror. Emphasis on bin Laden doesn't fit with the administration's strategy for combating terrorism." - 9/13/06

How about this gem, "President Bush operates in Washington like the head of a small occupying army of insurgents, an elected band of brothers (and quite a few sisters) on a mission. He's an alien in the realm of the governing class, given a green card by voters." - 11/23/04

I really see no reason to trust anything on Meatmouth's aforementioned site. The gays are coming?! OK. Cool. Let's party.

Googled "gay ruin marriage" for this one, he, he, he

Other things that will kill you

Hey Skeez! I've taken it upon myself to compile a list of things that (Along with vitamins) will kill you.

Please be careful my friends!

*Food
*Liquor
*Cars
*Airplanes
*Your neighbor
*Your secret lover
*Cellphones
*Your cat
*The Gays
*Mascara
*Laptop Computers
*Ipods
*Staplers
*Other miscellaneous office supplies

So you must not eat, drink, ride, play, or be within a 50 ft radius of the following things EVER!

You're welcome.

Luvs,
MeatMouth

Thinking about suicide?

Who knew?? Your office assistant can help! Well, not with the actual act, but with conceiving, editing, spellchecking and printing your last written words. Pretty heavy! Are there other words for "end it?" I'll bet your office assistant knows! Not only can you get a cute little animated, friendly paper clip, but a wizard and puppy dog as well! You choose! It will be one of the last, best decisions of your life! You'll love the suicide note assistant and everyone else will love the letter long after you've gone. Thanks, Microsoft!

I don't know; I just thought it was funny. Google imaged "suicide assistant"

Pills that KILL

Whatever. So I guess there's a study that was published today in the Journal of American Medical Association that insinuates vitamin taking may be harmful to your health.

Whoa, whoa, whoa...slow down a minute. The one thing I hate about some of this health news is how most of it relies on our fears. A great deal of it propogates a "you need to read this or die" ideal which is simply the best tool to encourage consumerism.

Now, with that said, let's get some things straight.
1. Living on pills alone will kill you.
2. The study was done mostly on antioxidant suppliments.
3. The study was done on all kinds of things that cause death in general.
4. There were no specific diseases or causes of death studied to conclude that swallowing antioxidant supplements will kill a person in a year or two.

Here's a quote that sums it up nicely:

However the scientific community and the pharmaceutical industry received with reservation the conclusions of the new study, underlining the benefits humans get from ingesting vitamin-supplements.

Andrew Shao, vice president for science and regulatory affairs at the Council for Responsible Nutrition, a trade association representing the dietary supplement industry, said that "They included every trial under the sun," Shao said. "Some [studies] were a day long, some were several years long. The majority of trials involved very sick patients -- treatment trials that were very, very different from how antioxidant supplements are used by most consumers, which is to maintain health."

The antioxidants in the study have widely different modes of action, one other critic of the study noted. "It's like putting two very different drugs together and drawing one conclusion," he explained.

In addition, he said, "they do not mention anywhere in the report what people are dying of," which makes it is difficult to attribute the deaths to the supplements and not to some other causes.

"You don't see people dropping dead right and left from overdoses of antioxidant supplements," he added. "It is just not happening. You have to explain to me how some essential nutrients kill you in a couple of years."

Antioxidant supplements "have been shown in a number of studies to have no adverse effects," Blumberg said. "They are not toxic, but evidence that they prevent heart disease and cancer is equivocal."

So, try not to fear the killer vitamin. Headlines are some of the most deceitful statements a person will find in the "news." Question everything!

Still scared? Check out this short article:
in The Austrailian. Or go to the source, JAMA.

PS Google Imaged "vitamin kills" and image at top is what I found.

Well...this is just

Funny.

Jesus is clinically dead?

So says James Cameron, Simcha Jacobovici, The Discovery Channel, BBC4 and Canada's Vision TV. But wait! Before jumping Christianity for radical Islam, read what the unbiased "BP News" straight outta Nashville, ya'll (Baptist Press) has to say!

I have faith it's not true

And just for shits and giggles, here's another load of shit from the liberal media.
Reuters

Some other takes on this fun topic!
Clergyman Questions Claims
Media should promote faith based programming instead of this "Jesus Tomb" hubbub
Some Canada News

I did read a blog with the headline, "Terminator 4: Rise of Jesus' Tomb." Fucking fantastic.

Here's what I found when I Googled "jesus rise grave." Yeah, I know. It's totally scary.

For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge

You're damn right. Welcome to VM where I will be making fun of all my favorite narcissists and with a little help from my jerky friends, I'll be calling out some of the lesser known assholes as well. And first on the list...I examine my own damn self. Yeah, I'm egocentric.

I'm not sure any of us can really help it. But sometimes (often) there are such extreme cases of this kind of narcissism, it can actually cause death as much as it causes idiots to breed (see, that's me being judgemental and self-centered). I really think some of these ridiculous armchair philosophers need to be shown the negative attention they deserve and me, being the conceited dick that I am, will do just that.

Me first. Ha...get it?

I fucking curse. I do it quite frequently and am accustomed to being glared down at the Costco for saying things like, "I can't fucking believe they sell hot dogs for $1!" or "That is a fucking huge ass TV," or "What the fuck does he think he's doing? Is he gonna fucking cut line?"

I am honestly trying to cut down, not because it offends people (which oddly enough, it's not as offensive as it once was), but because the more I use it, the less effective it becomes. When I say the word, "Fuck!" I really want people to be taken aback. If I break my ankle and yell, "darnit!" not that many people are going to come-a-runnin' to my aid. The shock value was pretty much the whole reason for using it in the first place. The word, when used infrequently enough, can really project a point onto unsuspecting ears.

I find it humorous just because of the whole meaning of the thing (that's right, it is actually still JUST a word...not a gun, knife or threat to your family - it's a word which allows you, the offended, the leisure, nay, the RIGHT to be vocally self-righteous in a public situation. That really is a fun thing to do sometimes). This one little word (f.u.c.k. = for unlawful carnal knowledge) has wreaked havoc all over the west, especially the US where it is perceived to be the most cursed word in the world.

Either way, I like the taboo and the joy I receive by punctuating a thought with "fuck." Try it sometime. Say something, anything, but use the word, "fuck." Go ahead! It easily interjects into just about any statement. Here are a few examples:

"I fucking miss you so much."
"Fuck, you're the best!"
"Why don't you sit the fuck down and take a fucking load off?"
"Would you like something to drink, fucker?"
"This fucking orange juice is tasty as fuck."

You get the picture. Now you try!

First image that popped up when Google Imaged, "fuck."